The real William
by Ukbitch111
Summary: Set in season 7. Buffys got a new boyfriend and Spike is back with a soul, but who will Buffy choose? And how far can love take you.
1. Return

**Chapter 1. The return.**

Buffy walked down Main Street to meet up with her boyfriend Tom, they had been dating for the last 3 months and everything was going okay. They had met though Willow. He knew about the slayer and was determined to meet her, Willow knew him from her trip to England. He was American but use to live in England, he came over with Willow to meet Buffy but never knew that he would fall in love with her.

"Hey." Buffy said and kissed Tom.

"Hey gorgeous." Tom replied and put his arm around her.

"So you ready?" She asked him.

"Yup I'm ready." He smiled at her.

"Lets do it." She said and they walked into the Sunnydale cinema hand in hand.

Back in the cemetery A girl was running and bumped into somebody.

"Oh god! Help me, please." The girl said scared.

"Who you running from?" The man Said in a British voice.

"I don't know? This thing-OH GOD! THERE IT IS!" She ran and hid behind the bleached haired Vampire, Spike. Spike threw his cigarette on the floor and walked up the vampire and punched him to the floor.

"Been a few months since I had a bit of action." Spike said and kicked the vamp in the chest. "I had to leave see." Spike kicked him again. "To show the slayer who I really am." Spike stood on top of the vamp and bent down. "And god will she be surprised." Spike snapped the vamps next and it turned to dust. He turned around to the girl who was shaking.

"You okay?" He asked and lifted his head.

"What-What was that?" She asked.

"Nothing you need to worry about love. You okay for getting home?"

"I guess so." She said and ran passed Spike and into the darkness.

Buffy and Tom left the cinema laughing and joking.

"I am so glad we walked out on that film!" Buffy said between laughs.

"And me." Tom smiled.

The girl who just got saved by Spike ran past them in tears. Buffy and Tom looked at each other and ran up to the girl.

"Hey are you okay?"

"You wouldn't believe me if I told you." The girl said between tears.

"Oh we would." Tom said.

"This thing chased me though the cemetery…And this person saved me."

"What happened to the thing what chased you?" Buffy said.

"It went poof! And disappeared."

"Are you okay now?" Tom asked her.

"Who saved you?"

"I don't know…This man with bleached hair and a long leather jacket…He was British." The girl said.

Buffy gulped and opened her eyes up wide. "Spike." She mumbled to herself.

"Who?" Tom asked her.

"Nothing, don't worry. See that she gets home safely."

"Where you going?"

"To the cemetery." She said and walked off.

R/R PLEASE!


	2. Found him

**I'm going to leave bits in from season 7 and add parts of my own! Hope you like it.**

**Chapter 2. Found him.**

Buffy walked alone in the cemetery where Spikes crypt was she kept her eyes wide open scanning the cemetery looking for the bleached vamp. Which wouldn't be hard seeing as his hair stuck out a mile. She heard people fighting and looked around and ran in the direction where the fighting was coming from. She stopped and pulled her stake out and then saw Spike kicking a vamp's ass. Spike brought out a stake and staked him and then turned around and saw Buffy standing there.

He wiped the blood from his nose and sniffed. "Buffy." He said all macho.

Buffy lowered her stake and looked at Spike shocked, she couldn't believe her eyes.

"I was wondering when I would run into you." He said.

"Spike?" She whispered.

"Yeah?"

"Where have you been?"

"Getting over you slayer."

"Right." She said and brushed her hair back and Spike saw a bruise on her face.

"Nasty bruise you got."

"Yeah vampire."

"So how are you?"

"Fine." She said still stunned.

"Well I better go, don't want to be in your way."

Spike brushed past Buffy and left her amazed. She felt something different about him but couldn't tell what. She looked over her shoulder and watched him walk into the darkness.

She went to the bronze to have a stiff drink, she was having fixed feelings for Spike and didn't know what to do. She sat at the bar and got a beer. She gazed at the beer and thought out Spike.

"Beer is for drinking." Anya said and pulled up a seat next to her. "Give me a beer." She sighed.

"Hey." Buffy said quietly.

"Hey."

"How's work going?"

"Boring. How is your work?"

Buffy shrugged her shoulders. "Life risking."

"So why you looking at that beer like its flowers or something." Anya drank her beer.

"Um…You know, just got things on my mind." Buffy said and smiled.

"Don't we all."

The two girls sat there in silence drinking their beers.

Spike walked in the Bronze and watched Buffy at the bar and got pushed by Tom who was walking in.

"Hey watch it mate." Spike said pissed off.

"Hey man I'm sorry." Tom smiled and walked over to Buffy and kissed her.

Spikes eyes opened and Spike lowered his head and then brought it back up.

"Screw it." He said to himself and walked up to the bar next to Anya.

"A beer please mate."

Anya and Buffy turned at looked at him.

"Spike?" Anya said and got up.

"Hey."

"Where have you been?"

"Everywhere."

"Spike?" Tom said in confusion.

"Yeah he's Buff-" Buffy nudged Anya.

"He use to work with me."

"In the fight against evil?"

"What are you on about, I am evil." Spike said and smirked.

Anya laughed. "You're as evil as a puppy dog Spike." Anya turned to Tom. "See what happened was that Spike got a chip in his head and he couldn't harm any living thing. Spikes a vampire."

"He's a vampire?" Tom said and turned to Buffy.

"Yeah." She nodded.

"And he helped you?"

"In many ways." Spike said and lit up a cigarette.

"He was useful as a demon fighter."

"William the bloody." Tom looked at Spike and smiled.

"That's me."

"You're a legendary vamp, you know that?"

"Yeah, I do."

"So Spike." Anya blushed. "What things did you do?"

"You know, just finding myself. I was a mess when I left here."

"Yes. You were." Buffy said with an attitude.

"Well I'm different now." Spike looked at them all.

"Oh…You are different." Anya said gob smacked looking into spikes eyes.

"What?"

"Oh my god!" She said and laughed a little.

"Spike what is she on about?" Buffy asked confused.

"I don't have a bloody clue." He said.

"Neither do i." Tom said and raised his hand.

Spike slammed his empty glass down on the table and stormed out. Buffy looked at Tom and Anya and walked out as well.

"Hi." Anya said and looked up at Tom.

"Spike!" Buffy called out to Spike and he stopped and turned around.

"Yeah?" He sighed.

"What did Anya mean?"

"I told you, I don't know."

"Yes you do. You're hiding something from me and I'm going to find out what."

"No. You wont." He started walking off and Buffy followed him.

"So where did you go for three months?"

"Around. I told you." He stopped again and looked at her.

"Just around?" She crossed her arms.

"Yeah, just around."

A man walked up to Spike with a knife. "Hey man give your money."

"Sod off." Spike said angrily and hit the man to the floor.

Buffy looked at Spike. "You're not in pain." She said.

"Oh yeah so I'm not." He said and started to walk off.

Buffy grabbed his arm and he hit her. "What happened to you Spike? Why do you not have a chip anymore?"

"Came with the package." He walked off.

Buffy was determined to find out what Spike was on about and followed him a church he walked in and Buffy stopped and stared at him walking in. Once he got in she carried on and walked in and looked around the dark church.

"Thought you would follow me!" Spike said and stepped out of the shadows. With out his leather jacket on and just a back T-shirt.

"Spike what is going on?"

"Nothing that concerns you. Now buggar off!"

"What happened-"

"If you knew how it felt." He said softly. "How it haunts me." He looked up at Buffy. "The last three months I've been out of my head, crazy, confused, afraid. I did it for you." He then laughed. "I don't know why. It was you who made me fall crazy in love with you."

"You don't-"

"Oh I do love you Buffy I tried not to-"

"Spike what are you talking about? You did this to me."

"I'm not a crazy man like I was three months ago. But I still can feel them, feel pain inside me." He started walking up to the cross. "This is what you wanted, or if it wasn't its to late now. It's gone it's all gone."

"The chip?" She whispered.

"The Chip came out, but I cant kill…I wont kill. It's wrong Angel knows how I feel."

Tears filled Buffys eyes and had realised what he had done. "Your soul?" She said softly.

"Yeah, my _soul._" He walked up to cross and took off his T-shirt and rested himself on the cross.

**I had to get the chip out of his head! Because it will effect something whats coming up. What you all think then?**


	3. Soul

**Thanks for your reviews!**

**Chapter 3. Soul**

Spike got off the cross and looked at Buffy, he had a burn of a cross across his chest. Spike looked at her and put his top on.

"You need help." She said softly.

"No I just need to be left alone."

"Spike it looks like you're still crazy to me."

"Well so would you, if you could feel the hundreds and thousands of people I have killed."

"Angel told me how it felt."

"Angel. He soul is a curse! The stupid poof." He laughed.

"But you have still got a bit of the old Spike in you."

"Of course I have!" He smiled. "I'm still Spike I just have a more soulful side of me."

"But you still need help."

"If I do, I don't want yours."

"Why not?"

"Buffy this is not the Spike you use to know…Well it sort of is. But the point is I'm different and what I did…tried to do." He hung his head. "It haunts me."

"You're a different man."

"I'm not even a man."

"Spike." She said softly.

He looked at her and saw that she was going to be there and help him.

"Where are you staying?" She asked.

"Anywhere." He shrugged his shoulders.

"Come on, let's go."

"Where?"

"Well I know Tom wont like it, but my house."

"Tom?"

"Yeah…I have been dating him for a few months."

"That's good." Spike smiled.

They both walked out of the church and back to Buffys house. As he walked in and looked around he could smell Buffy everywhere and he stared at her as she walked into the living room to see the gang.

"Guys…I have some news."

Spike walked in.

"Get him out of our house." Dawn said angrily and stood up.

"Its different now."

"Why? Doesn't he love you anymore?"

"He's got a soul." Willow said.

"What?" Xander half shouted.

"How did you-" Buffy started saying.

"I can feel it." Willow answered.

"That's what Anya was on about in the Bronze."

Spike nodded.

"So where is he staying?" Dawn asked.

"The basement."

Xander walked up to Spike. "You touch her, I'll kill you."

"And um by the way. Spike has no chip anymore."

"WHAT! These just gets better and better."

"I'll go make my way down to my new room. Doesn't look like I'm wanted here." Spike said.

"Spike your never wanted here!" Xander said.

Spike just looked at Spike and walked away.

"Are you sure about this Buffy?"

"He has been crazy for the last three months. Angel told me what it was like, to feel the people he killed, remember? He nearly killed himself!"

Nobody said anything. "Spike has changed I can feel it, Willow can feel it and Anya can. So I know he's not lying to me."

Buffy walked down to the basement and Spike was sat on pull out bed with a cigarette.

"Looks like you do your training down here now." He said.

She walked down and leant on the table opposite him. "Yeah."

"Look Buffy I'm not here to try and back with you. I can see clearly now more clearly that I use to see things."

"You were never clear Spike." Buffy smiled.

"Hey is this a private conversion or can anybody join in?" Tom said and walked down the rest of the stairs and kissed Buffy.

"Hey." She said sweetly.

"Hey, hey Spike? What are you doing here?"

"Asking a friend for help." He said smiling at Tom.

"You're helping him?" He said to Buffy.

"He has a soul."

"William the bloody has a soul?" Tom laughed. "Doesn't sound like William the bloody."

"It's just Spike and you don't know nothing about me. Expect what you read in your books." Spike stood up.

"I know enough." Tom said and looked at Buffy. "So we still on for tomorrow?"

"Huh?"

"The picnic?"

"Oh yeah, sure." She said and smiled.

"Well I'm going to grab a shower." Tom walked back up the stairs and Spike watched him.

"A picnic?" Spike said surprised.

"Yeah what's wrong with a _picnic?"_

"Just doesn't seem like you luv." Spike smiled.

"Things change. You should know."

"Yeah I should. Now you shown me my home can I go out?"

"Sure, I mean you don't have to ask me if you wanna go out. Where are you going?"

Spike smiled at her. "Bag some vamps. Come if you want."

"I think I need some time to get-"

"Right." Spike sighed and walked to the stairs. "See you later then." Spike walked up the stairs.

Tom walked into the kitchen and saw Xander and Spike walked past without saying anything.

"Hey xand."

"Hey."

"So you okay will the Spike deal?"

Spike heard and rolled his eyes and walked out the front door.

"No." Xander simply said.

"Why not?"

"Spike and Buffy…They're past."

"They have a past?"

"They were sleeping buddies."

"She had sex with him?"

"Yup, last year."

"When he had a soul?"

"Nope, he was soul free and had a chip he was in _love_ with her. Then when she tried to break it off he tried to rape her. Until then we have not seen him until tonight."

"So he got the soul because of Buffy." Tom said slowly.

"Got it in one."

"Do you think she still has feelings for him?"

"I don't know. But if Buffy trusts him then ill give her the benefit of the doubt. Even though I hate Spike."

Xander left the room and Buffy walked out of the basement.

"Hey, thought you was going for a shower?"

"Well." He smiled. "I thought you could join me."

"Humm." She smiled and laced his hands though hers. "Sounds like a plan. I'll go turn it on."

"Okay I'll be up in a sec!" He smiled at Buffy and when she walked out of the room the smiled faded from his face.

**Soooo what you all think ppl!**


	4. Old flames

**Thanks for your reviews! **

**Chapter 4. Old flames**

The next morning Tom walked down to the basement and threw a packet of blood onto Spikes chest. Spike woke up with a startle and looked up at Tom who was stood there with his arms crossed.  
Spike sighed. "What do you want?"

"Delivering breakfast. That's only if you didn't eat last night." Tom said with an attitude.

"I had some onion things from the Bronze. No blood mate." Spike said with a fake smile. "Where's Buffy?"

"Up stairs, getting ready."

"Right then. Well I think I'll grab a shower."

"Your home is in the basement."

"This pace stinks already, I don't think I want to add to the smell list."

Tom said nothing.

"Mind if you buggar off now?"

Tom turned around and walked up the stairs and into the kitchen.

"Morning." Willow smiled.

"Morning." Tom answered and sat down.

"So you fed Spike?"

"Yeah Buffy asked me to."

"Speak of the devil." Willow said. Buffy had walked into the kitchen.

"Hey." She said and poured out some cereal for herself.

"Did Dawn get off okay?" Willow asked.

"Yup, Xander just came and picked her up."

"Well I gotta get to college. See ya." Willow said and left the room.

"Did you give Spike that blood?" Buffy said with a mouthful of cereal.

"Yeah." Tom answered.

Just then Spike walked though the basement door.

"Morning." Buffy said and smiled at him.

"Morning." He said softly to her. "I'm just off to have a shower."

"Sure." She smiled and Spike walked away.

Tom looked at Both at them and saw that there could still be a connection between them.

"So you two where just friends?" He asked her.

"What? Yeah…Sort of."

"Looks like you were more than that."

"What?" She said confused.

"I'm not stupid Buffy, something happened between you, even a fool could figure it out."

"Its past, whatever happened doesn't matter anymore. I'm helping Spike be a good person now."

"Okay." He got up and kissed her. "I'm off to work."

"Work? I thought you didn't work on Tuesdays?"

"Extra money." He smiled and walked out.

Fifteen minutes later Buffy walked up stairs to go to her room she bumped into Spike had just a towel wrapped around him and he was drying his hair with another one.

"Oh god I'm sorry-"

"It's okay. It's my fault I didn't think you come up…"

"Where's your clothes?"

"In the bathroom I just went into your room if I could find any spray."

Buffy looked at him.

"Toms body spray."

"Oh right yeah sorry." She laughed.

"Again. It's okay." He smiled.

"I have to go to work soon, but we could patrol tonight?"

"Sure." He smiled and walked into the bathroom and shut the door.

Buffy looked at the closed bathroom door and looked away in sadness and walked into her room.

That night Buffy and Spike were just on there way out to patrol and Tom walked in the front door.

"Hey where you two off to?" He asked.

"Patrolling." Buffy said

"Oh."

"Why did you want to come?" She asked.

"Nah its okay it's been a hard day at work."

"Okay, I'll see you later then." She kissed him and Spike looked away.

"Bye." Tom smiled.

Buffy and Spike walked down the dark streets of Sunnydale in silence looking around.

"Full moon." Spike said looking up at the sky.

"So it is."

"Sorry I'm just trying to make conversion."

"I know, it is still a bit hard to talk to you."

"I understand."

"Where do you go?"

"Hum?"

"To get your soul."

"Otherside of the world. Seeked out a legend went though three trials and I passed them all, so he gave me back my soul."

"And your chip came out?"

"I guess." He shrugged his shoulders. "I only found out after I hit a African man."

"After you got it, where did you go?"

"Places, Places to be alone. Things were hard they still are, but not as hard as they were and I'm grateful you are helping me Buffy."

"I believe in you."

He stopped walking and looked at her and swallowed. "Never thought I would here those words come out of your mouth." He whispered and carried on walking.

"That was before you had a soul, you have changed how you use to be. Wow you use to _love _to be."

"Funny what you do for love."

Buffy didn't answer.

"Anyway how are things with you and Tomas?"

"Fine. I think he is a bit annoyed with the fact I have a vampire living with me."

"Well looks like he will have to get use to it."

"Spike."

Spike stopped and looked at Buffy.

"Yeah?"

"Wanna go for a quick drink at the bronze?"

"What?"

"Do you-"

"No, no I know what you said. Why?"

"I don't know because I like to have a drink, plus there will be vamps there."

"Yeah okay."


	5. Hard

**Chapter 5. Hard**

Buffy and Spike sat at the bar in the Bronze looking at all the people dance.

"Doesn't look like much is happening to night." Spike said as he lit up a cigarette.

"Nope."

"Wanna hit the cemeteries?"

"Um…"

"Well I have to pick up some stuff from my old place. I left some clothes there. If they are still there."

"Right, well I'll come with! Nothing happening here anyway."

They both get up and leave the Bronze and walk down the ally onto the street. Tom comes out from the shadows and watches them walk for a few seconds follows them to the cemeteries.

"Here it is." Spike sighed.

"Yeah." Buffy said awkwardly.

Spike opened the crypt door and walked in to the dark.

He looked around. "Still got my fridge, chair and oh look the TV is smashed." He turned to Buffy who was stood in the doorway. "Are you coming in?"

"Yeah." She hesitated and stepped in the crypt and memories came flooding though her mind. "Where are your clothes?"

"I left them in here." He opened a tomb and rummaged around and took out a black bag. "Still here. It's not the nicest place to keep them, but at least I have some more wear."

"Doesn't look like anybody is living here." Buffy said.

"Guess again." A vampire said who was stood in the doorway and walked in along with three others.

"Spike." The vampire said.

"See you make you self nice and comfy."

"It will do."

Spike walked up to the vamp. "Well it won't be yours for long." Spike punched the vampire and started fighting it.

The other two vampires joined and started fighting Buffy. Tom watched from a distance, Spike got knocked down and Buffy staked the other two vamps and went to his need. Tom watched them.

"Are you okay." She said and comforted him.

"Yeah." He said in pain. "Just hurt my back."

Buffy helped him up and he fell into her arms. They both were inches away from each other and just looked at each other. Tom saw and looked at them in disgust and walked away.

"Sorry." Spike smiled.

"It's okay. We better get you home."

They walked back to the house, Spike was sat on his pullout bed in the basement and Buffy was sat next to him.

"Are you sure you're okay?" She smiled.

"I'm fine." He said.

"Turn around and let me see you back."

She went to turn him around herself and he grabbed her hand to stop and she quickly pulled hers away from his.

"I better go see Tom." She said quietly and left.

Tom was sat upstairs with Dawn watching TV.

"Hey Buffy, how's Spike?"

"He's okay, just hurt his back."

"That's great news!" Tom said sarcastically and stood up.

"Why do you have a problem with this? With him."

"You do the math Buffy! He is a vampire, it's your job to kill him and then again you're paling around with him." Tom shouted at her

Xander and Anya walked in.

"Hey guys-" Xander said and stopped.

"Oh! A fight." Anya smiled.

"He is different."

"Right he has a soul."

"Tom this is how things work around here. Get use to it."

Tom stormed out of the house and Buffy followed him.

"Do we follow?" Anya said happily.

"What's with her?" Dawn asked.

"Shes not a demon anymore." Xander told Dawn.

"Why not?"

"Halfrek wasn't liking the work I was doing."

Tom stopped and turned around and saw Buffy. "What now?"

"Tom I can understand you being upset about this…But-"

"Xander told me about your past with Spike."

"He did?"

"And I'm just scared that I might loose you to him."

"Me and Spike are not like that anymore."

"I seen the way you look at him they way you are together. You have feelings for him."

"I don't." Buffy lied.

"Really?" Tom laughed.

"I don't. I want you I'm with you." She said queitly.

"But you don't love me." He said.

"How do you know?"

"I know."

"Well looks like you don't. Your one of the best things that has happened to me and for you to say you know I don't love you! Well your wrong."

"Sorry." Tom said and went and hugged her and she returned the hug.

Spike came limping out of the front door.

"Where you going?" Buffy asked.

"Out I'm meeting someone."

"Would this someone be dead?" Tom said.

"No. She is a human girl."

"Oh." Buffy said. "Have fun." She smiled.

"I'll try." Spike said smiling and walked past them.

Buffy took a deep breath and smiled at Tom. "Shall we."

Tom smiled back and they walked inside.

"Hey! Buffy want to here the latest news!" Dawn said excited.

"Yeah okay." She said

"I'm not a demon anymore."

"Your not?" Buffy smiled.

"Wait you were a demon?" Tom said.

"Yeah, but not a very good one." Willow laughed.

"That was only because I was rusty! I have been around humans to long and been one for to long."

Spike into Town and went to meet a girl outside a nightclub they both walked and sat by the bar.

"So Spike. What do you do for a living?" The lady said.

"Not a lot. How about you?"

"This and that." The lady smiled.

Spike sighed all he could think about was Buffy.

"What's wrong?" She asked.

"Look Teri I cant do this."

"Do what?"

"Date."

"Why not? I thought we were having fun."

"I'm in love with someone else and well the thing is. I can try so hard to get her out of my mind, I can date and that wont help. I know we have this feeling thing between us but…She belongs to someone else." Spike smiled at Teri and got up and left. He couldn't kid himself and try and forget about Buffy when everything he did was for her. Even if she didn't hear it from Spike himself she knew that he was trying and was a better man for her.

**any comments?**


	6. Love

**Chapter 6. Love**

**Did you notice in chap 5 Buffy didn't say the exact words "I love you." To tom? Humm might want to think about that haha :o)**

Spike walked into the house from walking home from town and Buffy was just walking past to the door into the kitchen and she jumped.

"Oh Spike." She said catching her breath.

"Hi." He smiled.

"Thought you were going out?"

"It didn't work out."

"Why not?"

"Because I cant move on." He said softly and looked away.

"I'm finding it hard to." Buffy whispered to him and He looked up at her.

"I better get back down to the basement." Spike sighed and walked away from Buffy.

"Spike." She said.

He turned around. "Yeah?"

"I still care about you."

"I know." He smiled and carried on walking away.

Buffy followed him into the kitchen and grabbed him arm and pulled him to face her. "I know things are different now with you and me having Tom. But you staying…Being around here makes me feel more safe."

"You're the slayer your safe from anything." He laughed.

"You know what I mean. Last year I was a mess as well."

"Tom." Spike smiled.

"Hey."

"Oh hey." Buffy smiled.

"I was just saying goodnight." Spike said and walked down to the basement.

Buffy walked past Tom and walked up stairs.

The next day Spike was in the house alone and just came out of the shower. He walked past Buffys room and looked in. He swallowed and carried on walking down the stairs and into the kitchen. He opened the fridge and got out a packet of blood and heated it up. He heard the door slam and looked out the kitchen door and saw Tom he looked away and rolled his eyes.

"Hey Spikey."

"It's Spike."

"What you doing?" Tom said annoyingly.

"Heating my blood up. Aren't you meant to be at work?"

"I'm on my lunch. I thought I would come and see how you are."

"Well I'm fine." He smiled at Tom.

"So your still in love with Buffy."

"Yeah I am. I'm not gonna hide it. Why do you have a problem with that?"

"You know what I think I'll go to the grotto for my lunch." Tom smiled and walked out.

That night Spike was walking down the ally by the Bronze and Tom walked out of the shadows and stood in front of him.

"What you doing here?" Spike asked and put his cigarette out.

"Patrolling." Tom simply said.

"That's nice." Spike tried to walk past Tom but Tom stood in his way. "Get out of my way." Spike laughed.

Tom raised a cross up at Spike and Spike backed away.

"What are you doing?"

"Doing what Buffy should be doing."

"And that would be doing?"

"Killing you."

"You can try mate." Spike smiled.

Tom punched Spike and Spike looked at Tom and laughed. "That the best you can do?" Spike said and hit Tom back.

"No." Tom punched Spike. I haven't even begun." Tom punched Spike again.

Spike laughed and kicked him in the head. "Right then, if it's a fight you want."

They started fighting throwing punches and kicks at each other.

"You're an animal." Tom said full of anger and went to punch Spike.

Spike blocked the Punch. "I know what this is about." And hit Tom down to the ground. "This is about Buffy and me, our past."

"Maybe it is." Tom started to get up from the floor and Spike kicked him again.

"I'm not here to steal your girl, but me and Buffy has something. We been o the end of the world and back."

Tom got up and stood there in pain and swung at Spike and Spike blocked it again.

"Your afraid because she still has feelings for me."

"So what."

"And that she doesn't love you."

Tom said nothing and charged at Spike and they both went flying to the floor. Tom was on top of Spike punching him, Spike threw Tom off him and jumped back up.

"It take that as a yes then." Spike laughed.

"You don't know anything." Tom said panting.

"I know Buffy and that eats you up inside. That I know her more than you."

"Maybe." Tom said lying on the ground.

Spike lit up a cigarette and looked at Tom who was on lying on the ground. "I love her, I really do. I mean I bloody went to the end of the earth to get a soding soul. And maybe she might love me, maybe she might not. But I know for one thing. Me and you will never compare to Angel." Spike said and helped Tom up.

"Angel?" Tom said confused.

"The love of her Life."

"She never-"

"Provably not. Shes his girl and always will be, they just can't be together."

"Why not?" Tom said still out of breath.

"He's got a soul like me, but if he has one single moment of true happiness he will loose it and turn back to his real self. Angelus."

"Angelus!" Tom said shocked.

"You heard of him?"

"He's the worst vampire recorded."

"Yup he is."

"So what makes him happy?"

"A shag. Not any old shag, a shag with Buffy."

Tom said nothing.

"They are soulmates and I will never compare to him or any other guy on this planet." He looked away and back at Tom. "Shes amazing woman she is the one thing keeping me sane. I don't know what I would do without her I've had her before and that was good. But…I had no soul and now I do I'm the kind of man she wants."

"You're not even a man." Tom said.

"No you're right I'm not. But she treats me like one, gives me respect like one and just knowing that is good enough for me."

"So are you gonna tell Buffy about-"

"Your call." Spike said and walked off into the shadows.


	7. Bruises

**Chapter 7. Bruises**

Tom came home all beat and battered he stumbled in the door and went into the kitchen and got the first aid box out. Buffy walked into the kitchen and stared at Tom.

"Ouch?" She said.

"Yeah." He smiled.

"What happened?"

"A vampire."

"Just one?"

"Yeah." He looked away.

"Must have been a hell of fight."

"Yeah it was."

"Come here." She said and sat him down and poured some cold water in a bowl and rinsed a towel out and pressed it against his wounds.

"Ow." He muttered.

"It's not that bad." She said and put a plaster on his cut.

"Hey I don't have super strong strength like you." He smiled.

"But you're a fighter."

"I am." He smiled.

He wrapped his arms around Buffys waist and started kissing her.

Spike walked in the back door and sighed. "Don't mind me."

They stopped kissing and Buffy pulled away.

"Spike!" She said. "You look beat up to."

"Yeah." He said and looked at Tom. "I ran into a few vamps."

"Are you okay?" She asked worriedly.

"I'll live." He smiled. "What happened to young Tomas." He nodded to Tom.

"A vampire." Tom looked at Spike coldly.

"Just one?" Spike smiled.

"What can I say he had a better advantage."

"I bet he did." Smiled Spike. "Well kids I'm off to my basement."

"I'll be down in a few minute's." Buffy looked at Spike and Spike nodded and walked down.

"Yeah I better get to bed and rest." Tom said and got up out of his seat.

"I'll help you up."

"No, I'm okay." Smiled Tom and kissed her on cheek and limped out of the room.

Buffy walked down the basement stairs and Spike was punching the punch bag. Buffy stood at the bottom of the stairs, she crossed her arms and watched Spike.

"If that bag was real they would be dead already."

Spike stopped, he turned round and looked at her and then lit up a cigarette. "That's the point." He said.

"What's wrong?" She asked and walked over to him.

"You better ask Tommy that."

"Why?" She went and leant against the table.

"The guy is a bloody idiot!" Angry Spike said.

"Why?"

"I just don't like him and he doesn't like me." Spike sighed and sat on his bed.

"He is just-"

"Yeah he just doesn't like vampires."

"Looks like those three vamps got you pretty good." Buffy said and looked at his bruises and cuts.

"Yeah."

Buffy went and sat next to Spike. "Things will be different. Once Tom comes to terms-"

"I'll be gone."

"What?"

"I'm going to find a place of my own."

"Didn't you listen to me? I said I feel safe with you around."

"And I will be, just not in your house."

"This is were I want you to be."

"I want to be here too, you're the only thing keeping me sane Buffy. But I can't get in the way with you and Tom."

"Your not."

"He is just, our past he doesn't like it."

"Well who would. You used me."

"I know."

"I didn't care back then. It was good and some part of me still thinks it is. But I know its not, not now. Not now I've changed."

"You were just there."

"I was an escape from your troubled life."

"Yeah."

"So why do you want me now? Your life seems to be pretty dandy."

"It is." She said.

Spike looked at her and tilted his head, she got up and walked away and turned to him. "Lets just say I see you different now."

"You said that."

"Well I do and the more I get to know this Spike the more I like." She walked up the stairs and Spike watched her walk up. He loved her more and more everyday but every time he thought he was getting closer to her she would walk away.

Buffy got up stairs and went into her room Tom was sat up in bed reading.

"You coming to bed?" Tom asked and put his book down on the side table.

"Yeah." She said and sat on to bed with Tom.

"You might want to get changed then." Smiled Tom.

"Okay." She muttered.

"I love you Buffy." He said softly.

"I know." She said and lent on him and he put his arm around her and kissed her head. He then looked up and looked disappointed and quietly sighed.

The next day Buffy was at Work at school and Dawn came to her office.

"Dawn." Buffy smiled.

"Hey!" Dawn waved at Buffy.

"Why are you here?"

"Free period." Dawn said and sat down.

"Oh. Well I have got students coming in-"

"And when they do I'll go!"

"Okay."

"So whats up?"

"Nothing."

"I mean with Spike, you don't talk to anybody about him much."

"That's because there is nothing to say."

"Well me Anya, Xander and Willow are going to the Bronze tonight you and Tom should come. I know he's pretty pissed off about the whole Spike thing."

"I know." Buffy sighed.

"So?"

"Okay we will."

"Great!" Smiled Dawn.

"Hi." Buffy said and looked up at a student.

"Okay I'm gone." Dawn said and scattered away.

"Take a sit." Buffy smiled at the student.

Buffy walked in her house after a long day of work and sighed. Anya popped up in her face smiling.

"Anya?"

"Hi."

"What do you want?"

"Well see Xander said you are coming to the Bronze and were going now and he said you wont go, but I said yes she will. But he said no she wont because she has just got back from work. And then I said-"

"Yeah you know what? You guys go down me and Tom will meet you down there."

"That's if he's well enough." Willow said and walked into the living room.

"Why?" Buffy asked.

"He is pretty beat up from last night."

"He's okay." She said sweetly. "He's a fighter." Buffy said and walked into the living room.

"Well are you two going?" Dawn said.

"Yes but not now."

"Okay well we will see you down their Buff." Xander said and smiled at her.

"Okay." She smiled and they all left.

Spike walked down the stairs and looked at Buffy sat in the living room on her own. "Where's everybody gone?"

"To the Bronze." Buffy looked at him.

"And you're not there because?" He said and stood in the doorway of the living room.

"I'm waiting for Tom go get back then were going."

"Right." Spike smiled.

"Are you coming?"

"And watch you and Tommy all loved up? No it wasn't on my things to do list."

"Right."

"That is why I suggested I left." He said and went and sat next to her.

"You can't."

"Whats stopping me?"

"Me." She whispered.

"Were going to go though this again." Spike sighed.

"You're the one who keeps saying your going to leave."

"And then you say you want me here and it makes me feel-." He stopped.

"Feel what Spike?" She sat up and looked at him.

Spike took a deep breath. "Like you want me, need me…Love me."

"I do need you here, you know do. And-"

She was cut off by Tom who walked in the front door and Spike rolled his eyes.

"Typical." He laughed. "Let's just leave it."

Buffy nodded.

"Leave what?"

"Patrolling tonight." Spike said.

"Willow, Dawn, Xander and Anya are down the Bronze I said we would meet them down there. Just the gang could go out for the night."

"Yeah that sounds good."

"That means for me to hit the cemeteries." Spike said and got up and looked at Buffy. "I might see you later." And walked out.

They got to the Bronze and sat down with the gang. Everybody was laughing and joking but Buffy could only think about Spike and how her sentence would of finished. She looked around the Bronze and looked at the stairs. She remembered their kiss and then quickly snapped out of it and smiled at Tom, who was looking straight at her and he smiled back.


	8. Anger

**Chapter 8. Anger**

Spike was in the cemetery kicking some vampire ass.

"Bloody Tom." He said angry and kicked the vamp in the head. "Thinks hes Buffys night in shining armour." He punched the vamp. "I will bloody show him the stupid ponce." He kicked the vamp to the floor and picked him up by his T-shirt and threw it against a headstone. "The stupid jerk thinks he can make her love him." Spike said and walked up to the vamp.

"Are you talking to me?" The vampire said.

"Well du!" Spike said.

"Who' Buffy?" The vamp asked.

"The girl I'm in love with." Spike said and staked the vampire. "Another bites the dust." He sighed.

He lit up a cigarette and decided to go to the Bronze just to piss off Tom. Spike hated every single tiny detail about him. The way he gelled his hair in the morning and how he flossed his teeth after every thing he ate.

Spike walked into the Bronze and saw them all sat down, Buffy looked over at the door and saw Spike stood there and walked over to him. Tom watched her walk over to him and sighed.

"I give up." He said and guzzled his beer.

"Hey." Buffy said sweetly to Spike.

"Hello." Spike smiled.

"How was patrolling?"

He breathed out. "Bagged a few vamps, no demons or anything."

"That's good, things seem to be normal around here lately."

"Yeah they do."

"Do you want to come and sit-"

"No I only came here for a quick beer." He paused. "Oh yeah and to annoy Tom." He smiled.

Buffy laughed at Spike and Spike smiled at her and they looked into each other's eyes and Spike turned away.

"Forget about the drink I'll go do some more patrolling I think."

"I'll come!" She sharply said.

"You got your buds." Spike nodded at them.

"I'd rather kick some ass." She smiled.

"Alright then, well I'll be outside."

Buffy walked over to the gang and grabbed her jacket.

"Where you going Buff?" Xander asked.

"Spike found a nest. Thought I'd better take a look."

"I'll come too." Tom said getting up.

"No!" She cried and then sighed. "Sorry its just look you're a walking hospital."

"I'm well enough to fight." Smiled Tom.

"No. Your not." She said convincing.

Buffy smiled at the others and walked out and met Spike in the ally and they started walking down the ally and heard the Bronze door slam and saw Tom standing there looking very pissed off.

"Tom? Whats wrong?" She asked him and he walked closer to them.

"Buffy I cant take this anymore." He said shaking his head.

"Take what?"

"Me." Spike said and crossed his arms.

"Oh my god! Tom get over it, stop being jealous nothing is going on." Buffy sighed.

"I know nothing is going on, now. But everyday you two are getting closer and closer. I'm your boyfriend you're meant to be close to me Buffy!" Tom said and brought out a stake. "He's a vampire he's killed millions."

"And saved thousands." Buffy said and stood in Tom's way.

"You can't see it. You're in love with the fool."

"I'm not know fool mate." Spike said and stood inches away from Tom.

"You're a vampire in love with the slayer. That makes you a fool."

"Yeah but I'm no the only vampire in love with her." Spike smiled. "But wait we had this conversion before. Remember? When you tried to kill me."

"The other night." Buffy mumbled.

"Yeah." Spike turned to Buffy. "I thought your boyfriend here was going to tell you."

"But he didn't."

"No, he didn't." Spike said and looked coldly at Tom.

"Why didn't you tell me Spike?" She asked.

Spike faced Buffy. "Because I didn't want to get in the way of you and him."

"To late for that." Tom said deeply.

"Both of you stop!" Buffy cried. "Tom stop acting so jealous and Spike…Spike just stop taunting him. I cant believe you did that Tom, you know how I feel about Spike."

"A bit to much." Tom said.

"Tom you need to stop acting like a jerk! Spike is here to stay he is here to help me, you, my friends, everybody! You should be grateful for that and stop thinking that him and me are reliving the past, because we are not. Never ever again." She convicted herself.

Spike looked away and Buffy walked off on her own.

Tom looked at Spike. "What you're not going to follow her?"

"No, I'll leave that to the boyfriends job." Spike said and watched Tom run and find her.

Spike walked back to the house and packed up his things and left a letter on the kitchen table and then heard the door slam and saw Buffy walk into the kitchen. Spike swallowed and looked at her.

"What are you doing?" She asked.

"Leaving."

"What? No, no Spike don't."

"I have to look at the mess I've caused. It explains everything in the letter."

"Where are you going?"

"LA." He said softly.

"Spike please don't go." She said as tears filled her eyes.

"I have to this…Watching you with him its to hard. I thought I could manage but a part of me can't."

"Don't do this."

"I have to. Goodbye Buffy."

He brushed past her and walked towards the door Buffy grabbed him and they both looked at each other and tears filled their eyes. Buffy looked at him and then at his lips and started kissing him, Spike dropped his bag and wrapped his arms around her as they kissed passionately like they had never kissed before. Buffy heart started racing, she stopped and tears fell down her eyes.

"Don't go." She whispered.

Spike leant his forehead on her forehead and Whispered to her. "I have to." And picked his bags up and walked out of the front door and into his black car. He slammed his car door and wiped the tears away from his eyes. Buffy looked out the window at Spikes car, she couldn't see in but he could see out. He looked at her whom he thought would be the last time he would ever see her and reversed out of the driveway.

Buffy put her head in her hands sniffed, she wiped her tears away and looked at the letter on the kitchen counter.

**Don't worry spuffy fans! Spike will be back lol. Thanks for your reviews!**


	9. The letter

**Chapter 9. The letter.**

Buffy gazed at the letter Spike had left her and walked over closer to it and stared at it. She heard the front door opened and quickly picked it up and put in down her top.

Tom who was panting out of breath came running in the kitchen.

"Buffy." He said catching his breath.

"What?" She said angry.

"I'm sorry. I am so sorry."

"Don't worry, You won, he's gone. Happy now?" She brushed past Tom and tom grabbed her arm.

"What do you mean?"

"He has gone, he's left town."

"When?"

"About 3 minutes ago."

"You've been crying." He mumbled.

"I have."

"He has gone because of you Tom. Because you were jealous!" She looked at him. "I can't be with you."

"What why?"

"Why do you think! I can't trust you, you get jealous, you don't make me feel happy."

"I'm sorry Buffy I can change I will I promise!"

"It's to late. Go back to wherever you came from and get out of my life."

She started walking up the stairs and Tom grabbed her again.

"No." He shook his head. "You can't give up what we got."

"We don't have anything."

"I'm in love with you Buffy."

"Well news flash! I'm not in love with you."

"I know. I've known that for ages, but look I'm still here."

"That's your choice and now its mine. I don't want to be with you anymore."

"All this over a stupid vampire!" He yelled.

"He is not a stupid vampire." She yelled back. "You were not here last year! You do not what I went though with him. And for him to come back a better man to do what he did for me!" She shook her said. "You will never know." She sighed.

"I want to be here for you Buffy."

"Because Spike is out of the picture now."

"God!" He shouted. "I don't care about Spike I just want you."

"It's never enough."

"Please everything was so good before he came and you know it was, we were amazing together and he still could be."

Buffy said nothing and looked at Tom and he backed down the stairs and looked up at her. "I can't make you be with me. I can't." He shook his head. "But I know what we got, had, or have is something worth saving. Whenever your ready to talk." He said and walked out of the front door.

Buffy sat on the stairs and ripped open the letter from Spike.

_Dear Buffy,_

_You know how much I love you and how much I want to be with you. But ever since I have came back things have gone wrong for you and your life. So it's best if I'm not part of it. I am leaving or I should say I have left I'm going to start fresh in LA. Hopefully I won't run into Angel but I know it's for the best, for both of us. I know you have never loved me but I know you care about me and give me respect and that's enough to know. _

_I will always be thinking of you._

_Spike xxx_

Tears fell onto the paper and smudged the writing, she didn't know how to react and looked at the banisters and saw Spikes leather jacket hanging over it. She saw it and knew he would come back he was lost without it, she picked it up and could smell the sent of Spike on it. Which pretty much smelt of booze and cigarettes. She carried it upstairs and put it on her chair and sat on her bed and stared at it.

Spike meanwhile was riding down the highway in his car and looked in the back seat to see if his jacket was there.

"Shit." He said and rubbed his chin.

He stopped the car and thought about if he should go back and get it. But he then thought that if he never wanted to go back and see Buffy in the future it would be an excuse.

"Worth a shot." He said and carried on driving.

He had the taste of Buffy in his mouth and it made him harder to not think about her and not to cry.

"Come on Spike pull yourself together." He sniffed.


	10. Three weeks gone

**Thanks for your reviews! An old friend will be apearing in this Chapter but he will only be in it this chapter and maybe one later I don't know! **

**Chapter 10. Three weeks gone.**

It had been three weeks since Spike left, his jacket still was on Buffys chair in her room, and she looked at it almost everyday hoping he would return. Now that he was gone she knew how much he meant to her and how she needed him in her life.

She walked down the stairs getting ready to go out patrolling.

"Hey Buffy!" Dawn said cheerfully.

Buffy smiled and walked towards the door. "I'll see you guys later." She said and opened the door.

Tom was stood there at her doorstep and Buffy looked at him and sighed. He took a deep breath and Buffy just pushed past him and closed the door.

"Buffy." He said and followed her.

"Go away." She said walking away from the house.

"No." He said manly.

Buffy turned around and saw him stood right in front of her face, she rolled her eyes and hit him to the ground. "Get out of my life." She said and walked away from him.

Tom laid on the ground he wiped his mouth and spat the blood out he got back up and ran up to Buffy.

"I can't let you go." He said walking along side her.

"Well I have let you go. About three weeks ago."

"Being without you…It's hard."

"You will get over it."

"I won't get over you."

"You're not what I want."

"Your what I want though."

Buffy said nothing.

"I never knew I was going to fall in love with you Buffy, I just thought I'll meet the slayer, the one who is known around the whole world." He took a deep breath. "And then I saw you. Everything around you stopped, time stood still. I knew I never had been in love until I laid my eyes on you."

Buffy stopped walking and faced him. "And what was meant to do what?"

Tom shrugged his shoulders.

"Make me forgive you and fall into your arms. Well I don't work that way."

"I noticed." Tom sighed.

"Please just go away."

"Make me."

"I thought I did when I hit you."

"It's gonna take more than that." He smiled.

She carried on walking and he walked along side her again.

"Look Tom-"

"No wait let me say one more thing." He breathed in. "Just tell me now that you don't have any feelings for me at all. And I'll get out of your life."

"I do have feelings for you still, but I can't." She shook her head.

"Why can't you?"

"He might come back." She whispered.

"Spike." He sighed. "It's been three weeks."

"I know."

"Please can we just give us one more go."

"I don't know." She said and walked away from him. "Don't follow me."

Tom watched her and kicked the air with his foot and walked the opposite way.

Meanwhile Spike walked along the streets of LA still new to his surroundings. He lit up a cigarette and saw a couple, he stood and watch them kiss and cuddle from the back it looked like Buffy he closed his eyes clicked his neck. He opened them again and saw a person stood in his face.

"What the hell do you want?" Spike sighed.

"Money, please can you spear some money." The man said.

"Pfft." Spike walked past the man and carried on walking.

He reached a dark ally way and walked down it, his car was parked outside a building, which looked like nobody had lived in it since the 18th century! He sat down on a small wooden chair and sat alone in the dark.

Buffy walked alone in the cemetery gripping her stake in her hand tightly and closed her eyes as she thought about Spike. She opened her eyes with a sigh and saw a vampire rising out from its grave. It got out and growled at Buffy, Buffy staked it without any hassle and carried on walking.

She went to the bronze and looked around to see if anybody was there, but no sign of the gang. She sat at the bar and ordered a drink and saw Tom staring into his drink on the other side of the room. Tom looked up and sighed and didn't notice Buffy.

Buffy walked over to him with her drink and sat down.

"Buffy?" He smiled.

"Hey."

"What you doing here?"

"Same reason as you." She said and raised her glass.

"Right." He nodded.

"You're right, Spike is gone and I doubt it very much he will be back. He made that pretty clear when he left. I need to move on with my life but not with you."

Tom looked down and back up Buffy. "At lest I tried."

"Still friends?"

"I'm going back to LA."

"What is it with everyone moving to LA!"

"I got a job there."

"Oh."

"So I'll be moving there."

"When?"

"Well I was meant to leave by two days ago. But I got so caught up trying to get you back but I thought I wouldn't need to have the job."

"So when are you leaving."

"About…" He looked at his watch. "Now." And drank the rest of his drink.

"Goodbye Tom."

Tom smiled. "Hope everything works out okay."

"You seen calmer."

"I can't get you and I have no realised that."

Buffy smiled.

"Bye Buffy." He smiled and left her to sit alone.

Spike walked out of his 'house' and walked down the ally and out on to the streets. He needed some action so he hit some bars and sat alone and drank.

"Waiting for someone?" A vampire came up and asked him.

"No luv, on my own."

"Then can you buy me a drink."

"Whatever she wants." He said without really caring to the demon barman.

"So what's Spike doing in a place like this?"

"You know me?"

"Of course I do Spike." She smiled.

Spike looked at her and tilted his head. "Please be dear and explain."

"I'm a friend of Angels as well."

"Didn't think Angel hung around with people like you."

"Well you know Angel."

"Oh god I do" Spike sighed and sipped his drink.

"He said get out of his town."

"Did he now?" Spike smiled.

"Yes."

"Now I thought Angel would come tell me himself."

"He's a busy boy, he's has stepped up in the world."

"That's nice."

"He saw you last night. He could smell the slayer all over you."

"Are you in love with her." A voice said what came behind Spike.

Spikes span around on his seat and saw Angel stood there.

"I wonder when I would see you." Smiled Spike.

"What are you doing here Spike?" Angel sighed.

"Just passing I'll be gone I a few weeks maybe months but soon."

"No. Leave now."

"And go back to Sunnydale?"

"No just go anywhere but here!"

"Talked to Buffy lately?"

Angel sighed. "Last I heard she was with a boy called Tom."

"That she was, don't know if she still is."

"What?"

"I came back to Sunnydale and to answer you question yeah I am in love with her."

"So why are you here?"

"I can't be with her, same reason you cant."

"More like she wont be with you."

"No see I've had a bit of a change."

Angel sat down next to Spike. "Beer." He said to the barman. "Like what?"

"Oh now you're willing to sit down and talk to me about my troubled life." Spike put his hand on his chest. "I'm touched."

Angel hit Spike in the arm. "Don't push it boy."

"Boy?"

"I got years on you."

"Yeah so you have." Spike shrugged his shoulders and lit up a cigarette.

"Where's your jacket?"

"I forgot it."

"You left it here?"

"At Buffys."

"And your not going back to get it?"

"I want to but I wont."

"Look were getting of the subject here. You said you changed?"

"Got me a soul."

"You what!" Angel shouted and stood up.

"I got a soul."

"You cant!"

"I have."

"But-But."

"But I've stole your thunder?"

"What did Buffy say?"

"I did it for her, the whole bloody soul thing. She couldn't love me when I was soulless so I went and got one."

"Can you loose it?"

"No."

"So you could be with her."

"Could, should, would?"

"She said about your past."

"She did?" Spike said stunned.

"Yeah."

"Wow. Didn't see that one coming." Spike laughed.

"I'm getting to a point here."

"Oh do carry on chap!"

"She said what happened in that year and how you 'helped' her."

"She used me!"

"Spike!"

"Sorry."

"I could see it then she had feelings for you." Angel sighed. "I can't believe I'm going to say this." Angel paused and looked away and looked back at a smiling Spike. "She needs you."

"She told me that."

"So why are you here? In my town."

"Because I'm no good for her!

"I can become evil you can't! Never ever again."

"I know but I'm still Spike at heart."

"You don't-"

"It was a phrase you silly bint."

"Go back to Sunnydale."

"You just don't want me in your town."

"Spike look. You know how I am when it comes to Buffy, would I want you to have her or you stay here in my town and see you every so often."

"Good point. Why are you helping me?"

"Because its for Buffys sake as well."

"You know what Angel. Your kinda all right, apart from the brooding and all that bollocks."

"So are you going back?"

Spike sighed. "No." He whispered. "I might I can't not yet. We left things…" He sighed again. "I don't want to say. Look at me talking to you about my troubles." He smiled.

"Just please stay out of my way." Angel said and walked away.

"Believe me I bloody will try." Spike called out to him.


	11. Waiting

**Chapter 11. Waiting.**

Buffy got home from a long day at work! She sighed as she walked in the door and saw everybody standing in the living room.

"Jeez who died?"

Nobody said anything.

"What's going on?"

"Tom has gone." Xander said.

"I know." Buffy said without caring.

"It's just you and him were so good." Willow said.

"He- I couldn't trust him."

"It's because of Spike." Xander said.

"Parts, yeah."

"Buffy get over him." Xander sighed.

"What do you mean?"

"Life was all great before he came back."

"That is why he left."

Nobody answered.

"He left because he felt that he was ruining my life."

"He was." Xander said.

"I didn't think you would understand you hate him."

"I do but I trusted you and you thought it was a good idea, the whole Spike idea."

"It was."

"So why are you moody and gloomy?" Anya asked.

"I don't expect you to understand."

"Well tell us." Dawn said stood with her arms crossed.

"Buffy were not getting mad we just want you to be the happy Buffters you use to be like."

"And I will be, just I have things on my mind."

"And we all know what things they are." Anya muttered.

"No not Spike. Maybe stuff what doesn't concern vampires! Like work?"

Nobody said anything.

"I have to get changed to go patrolling." She said quietly and ran up the stairs.

"She will be okay, just give her time." Dawn said.

A few minutes later Buffy came down the stairs dressed in all dark clothes and looked at everybody sat in the living room.

"Want some help?" Willow asked.

"No thanks, I'll be okay." Buffy walked out and slammed the door.

She walked down the street with her hands in her pocket kicking a can along the sidewalk she didn't notice the woman she bumped into. She turned around to say sorry and the person looked back and it wasn't a woman.

"Let's go." Buffy sighed and the vampire charged at her and they started fighting on the sidewalk. Buffy got on top of her and staked her.

"It seems to easy." She sighed.

Spike was sat on a bench near the beach in LA looking up at the stars and smoking a cigarette deciding what to do with the rest of his internal life. He sighed and smoke came out of his mouth. He cleared his throat and turned around.

"Hello." He said to the woman stood there behind him and stood up.

"Hey."

"So why are you out here in the dark all alone?"

"The beach is a great place to think and the stars are beautiful."

"They're alright."

"So why so gloomy?"

He shrugged his shoulders. "I could ask you the same thing."

"I'm not."

Spike looked confused. "So why did you say you were?"

"Technically I didn't."

"What's with all the mystery stuff luv."

"Your British." She smiled.

"And you're American."

"Sorry." She laughed. "I've never met a British person before."

"Now you have." He said and walked away.

"Where you going?"

"To be alone." He said and walked back onto the streets.

Spike walked down the same street as he has done for the past three weeks and a half. Nothing had changed, nothing ever new happened until tonight.

He walked round a corner and bumped into new boy in town Tom. Tom dropped his shopping bags.

"Watch were you going you jer-" He stopped and saw Spike stood looking at him very confused.

"Spike!" "Tom!" They both shouted at the same time.

"What the bleeding hell are you doing here?" Spike asked.

"What the hell are you doing here?"

"I asked first."

"I got a job. You?"

"I think you know." Spike said and brushed past him.

"You left."

Spike turned around. "Well done."

"She misses you."

Spike said nothing.

"She wouldn't take me back so I left, she is still hung up about you leaving."

"She is?"

"Yeah."

"She will get over it."

"That's not a nice thing to say." Tom smiled.

"Well it wasn't exactly easy leaving her." Spike tilted his head.

"You left your jacket."

"That I did." Spike said lighting up a cigarette.

"How long have you been here for?"

"Since the night I left Sunnydale."

"That was some night."

"Why are you acting all friendly with me anyway?"

"I'm not!"

"Oh please." Laughed Spike. "I take it a poof like you is finding it hard to find friends."

"No." Tom laughed.

"Then what is it then? Hum?"

"Nothing."

Spike tilted his head.

Tom sighed. "Same reason as you."

"No, me and Buffy are completely different."

"How?" Tom crossed his arms.

"For a start she wanted you gone, she wanted me to stay! Me and her have something you will never have-"

"So why are you here."

"It's better off I'm gone."

"How long you in town for?"

"However long I want, I can come go when I please."

"Well I won't get in your way."

"But seeing as you're not In Sunnydale anymore I might pay Buff a visit." He smiled.

"Go on." Tom said without caring.

"Okay? I was expecting you to go mad."

"Nah, I'm cool with it all."

"You are?" Spike smiled.

"Your who she wants, go to her."

Spike shook his head. "I better not."

"Believe me you should." Tom said and walked away from Spike.

Spike stopped and thought about he should do and then walked down the ally way to his crappy house.

Meanwhile Buffy sat onto a headstone looking around the cemetery bored stiff. She jumped down and walked out of the gates and back onto the streets, she walked down Main Street and round the corner to the Bronze. _Maybe the guys are there._ She thought to her self and walked in the Bronze which were full of school kids from Sunnydale High.

"Miss Summers! What are you doing here?" A boy came up and said to her.

"Just hanging out like you guys are."

"But you're like a-"

"I am not a teacher." She laughed. "Plus look. My friends are over there."

She walked over to Willow Xander and Anya. "Hey! Where's Dawn?""

"She's round Becky's." Willow said.

"Oh okay, cool."

"Want a drink Buff? I was just about to go up!"

"That would be nice." Buffy said and sat down on a couch.

"So how was patrolling?" Willow asked.

"Okay. Not to much going on."

"That makes a change. There is usually blood, death more blood." Anya said.

"Yup! So it's a good thing."

"Oh my god Buffy that guy is totally checking you out!" Willow smiled.

Buffy turned round and saw a dark hair guy with a group of friends smiling at Buffy. Buffy turned back round. "I'm not in the mood for dating."

"Plus she only goes for dead guys." Anya laughed.

Buffy looked at Anya.

"Or maybe not." Anya said scared.

"I just keep thinking he will come back."

"Who will?" Xander said putting the drinks on the table.

"Spike." Anya said.

"Oh. Well he might." Xander said.

"I thought you didn't care?" Buffy said.

"Whatever makes you happy." He smiled.

Buffy sat and stared blankly at the people dancing and thought about what Spike was doing.


	12. Welcome home

**Chapter 12. Welcome home.**

The next night Spike sat in his old wooden chair in the house that was falling apart. He sighed and got up and walked out towards his car. He stopped and looked at the window. No reflection. He pulled his hand away from the handle and thought if he was really what Buffy wanted and if he should go back. He closed his eyes and pictured her in his head, he opened his eyes and looked up at the dark sky. He sighed and opened the car door and pulled out of the ally and drove off.

Buffy was sat eating a meal with Dawn and Willow. She was sat playing with her food and Dawn and Willow were just looking at each other.

"Umm, so Buffy how was work?" Willow started with saying.

"It was okay." Buffy mumbled.

"Are you going out patrolling tonight?" Dawn asked.

"Probably." She said distantly.

"Can I tag along?" Dawn asked.

"No." Buffy said still distant.

"Why not?"

"Because I want to be on my own."

"You always want to be on your own!" Dawn shouted.

This brought Buffys attention back and she looked at Dawn. "Dawnie-"

"It's going to be like last year again!"

"No Dawn I promised it won't."

"Then stop distancing yourself." Dawn got up and stormed up the stairs.

"Is she right?" Buffy asked Willow.

"In some ways." Willow said and started clearing up the plates.

Buffy helped and they both walked into the kitchen.

"I don't mean to be! I just come up really tired at nights and then I have to go out and fight evil! I don't have time to pal around and be a sister-" She stopped and looked at Willow. "Oh god."

Willow nodded. "You need to be a sister as well as a worker and slayer."

Buffy sighed. "I just wish Spike was around."

"I know you do."

"But I guess he won't be." She sat down.

"Do you love him?"

"What?" Smiled Buffy.

"Do you love him."

"I care a lot about him."

"But do you love him?"

"I've seen a change in him, I've seen the man he really is…He changed for me and he is a soft gentle man. Or should I say vampire."

"I know what you mean." Willow said sweetly.

Buffy smiled. "Thanks."

A couple of hours later Spike drove into Sunnydale and looked around his surroundings. He parked the car and stepped out with a cigarette in his mouth.

"Home sweet home." He laughed and just left the car and walked around.

He walked down a few streets and stopped and sniffed the air, he looked around and sniffed again.

"Buffy." He said softly and walked towards her sent.

He walked into an ally and saw her Battling two vampires, for a second he didn't help her but just watched her and smiled. As he saw the second vampire was getting an advantage he ran over and kicked its ass and dusted it. As the dust cleared Buffy saw Spike standing there smiling at her.

"Buffy."

"Huh?" She whispered.

"Hello to you too." Smiled Spike.

"Spike?" She whispered.

"It's me."

"I thought you left."

"I did, but you know what they say. Home is where the heart is, or in my case you are."

"So are you passing by-"

"I was hoping I would stay here."

"For good?"

"That is the plan."

"In my basement."

"That's if you want me to."

"I do." She said without hesitating.

Spike smiled. "That's good then."

"When did you get here?"

"About ten minutes ago."

"You found me that quick?"

"I could smell you."

"Ew?"

Spike smiled.

"Where did you go?"

"I told you, LA."

"Did you see Angel?"

"I did see peaches."

Buffy put her hands on her hips and laughed at Spike. "How is he?"

"He has stepped up in the world."

"That's good."

"And I saw Tom."

"When?"

"Last night."

"I wasn't expecting that."

"He said you missed me."

"I do…I mean I did."

"What will happen about us?" He asked and leaned against a wooden box.

"I don't know."

"What do you want to happen?"

"I want you to be here with me."

Spike nodded. "That I can do."

"You can do more than that." She said and grabbed his shirt and starting kissing him.


	13. Is it love?

**Thanks dudes for all your reviews and I'm glad your loving the story lol! **

**Chapter 13. Is it love?**

Buffy stopped kissing him and looked into his eyes.

"Spike." She said as tears filled up her eyes.

"What's with all the sadness pet?"

"Happy tears." She laughed.

"I'm glad they are happy tears and not sad tears." He smiled. "I think been though enough sad moments in our time."

"We have." She said softly. "So was it just me the reason you came back?"

"No."

Buffy looked confused.

Spike smiled." I forgot my leather jacket."

Buffy laughed.

"So I take it you want us to be together?" He asked.

"I do."

Spike knew in the long run it wouldn't work but he was too lost in her eyes to even thing about the future and just kissed her.

They walked down the street to Buffys house and walked in. They both walked into the living room and everybody looked at Spike.

"Spike?" Xander jumped out of his chair.

Spike smiled and crossed his eyes.

"Spike is back."

"For good?" Dawn asked.

"Well-" Buffy looked at Spike.

"For now." Spike smiled at them all.

"Great. That's great!" Xander smiled sarcastically.

"Xander!" Buffy looked at Xander.

"Sorry. You know how I feel about Spike."

"Well your going to have to get use to it."

"I guess I will." Xander said and sat back down.

"My jacket?" Spike turned to Buffy.

"Oh it's…Um I'll show you."

They both walked up the stairs.

"Do you think they are?" Xander asked.

"Who knows!" Willow said.

"I bet they are going to have sex." Anya cheerfully said.

Buffy and Spike walked into her bedroom, Spike saw his leather jacket slung over the back of her chair and went and picked it up.

"Funny how you miss things." He smiled.

"I'm glad you did forget it." She paused. "I had a little bit of you still with me." She said softly. "You're a changed man Spike and you're on my mind all the time…Even when you were evil I needed you in my life." She took a deep breath. "Your- I love you."

Spike swallowed and his eyes opened up and he looked at her. It was the words he had longed to hear and now she was saying them all he could think about was how he didn't want to hurt her.

He though his jacket on the bed. "All these years." He laughed. "Never thought I would ever here those words come out of your mouth."

"They did."

He breathed in. "I know I will never compare to Angel and I know you say you love me-"

"I do. You know how me and Angel are, you…Me and you can…We connect how nobody else can."

"I know." He smiled. "I understand you."

"And I understand you." She smiled.

He smiled at her and put his hand on her faced and brushed back her long blonde silky hair.

"I'm pretty tired." She whispered.

"Right, you get some shuteye."

"Okay." She smiled.

"If you want me…Well I'll be down in the basement." He smiled.

He walked down the stairs and into the kitchen, Xander was making a snack and looked up at Spike.

"Hey Spike! I think there are some tasty blood treats for you in here!" Xander smiled.

Spike looked at her and swung the fridge door open. "So there is." He smiled and walked towards the microwave and put the packet of blood in there.

"So are you and Buffy?"

Spike said nothing.

"I take that as you don't want to talk about."

"No I don't."

"So where did you go to?"

"LA."

"Run into any friends, Like Angel?"

"As a matter of fact I did." He said facing Xander. "He told me to come back to Sunnydale. He said that Buffy wanted me and needed me. I saw Tomas too he said the same."

"I'm not going to lie. And as much as I can't believe I'm going to say this…Buffy does need you in ways, you're her rock. Not like the rock in our friendship group. It's hard to explain-"

"I get it."

"And I can see myself that you have changed. I just don't want to believe it."

"I don't blame you, what I did…Me and Anya." Spike took a deep breath. "That was the old me."

He took his blood out and walked down to the basement to his bed. "Some things I missed, some I didn't." He sighed looking at the bed.

Hours went by and Spike sat up in bed humming to himself, he looked at the clock it was pretty late. He looked up at the ceiling and heard footsteps. He put on some pants and a black shirt and went up, he was hoping it might be Buffy. He walked into the kitchen from the basement and no sign of anybody he walked towards the stairs and heard Buffys bedroom door slam he took a deep breath and walked up the stairs and knocked on door.

"Come in." She whispered.

Spike walked in and shut the door. "I thought I heard somebody up."

"Yeah can't sleep."

"Same here." He sighed and sat on the end of her bed. "I been sleeping in a bloody shit hole for the last month I thought at least I could get a good night sleep, even if it was on that pull out bed."

"I know that bed is pretty old."

"Yeah it's all lumpy." He complained.

Buffy looked at him and laced her fingers though his Spike looked at her and swallowed. He leant over to her and starting kissing her passionately as she started to undress him.

When Spike woke up the next morning in her bed he looked around and she was know where to be seen, maybe because it was 10AM! She had gone to work and Spike had the house to himself. He pulled the covers off him and put on his under pants and walked into the bathroom and turned on the shower. He looked in the mirror and again like the car reflection he couldn't see himself. He then thought if he was really want Buffy wanted, needed.

"Bloody hell I'm starting to sound like peaches." He laughed.

When Buffy came home after work Spike was sat watching Passions and quickly turned it off when he saw Buffy stood in the doorway of the living room.

"Passions?" Laughed Buffy.

"What?"

"A big bad ass vamp like yourself watching Passions!" Again she laughed.

Spike got up and smiled at her. "Timmy got married. It was a hell of an episode."

Buffy laughed. "So do you want to patrol tonight?"

"Yeah sure!" He shrugged his shoulders.

"Cool, I'm just going to grab a shower and have a bite to eat." She smiled and skipped up the stairs.


	14. Happy times

**Okay when it comes to English in school I am so shit at it! So I am trying my best sorry! I said at the start of the fic that Spike had, had his soul for three months so by then he wouldn't be crazy. Thanks for all your reviews! Hehe.**

**Chapter 14. Happy times!**

Buffy came down after her shower looking fresh and clean. Spike watched her walk down the stairs and gazed at her.

"What's wrong?" She said.

"Nothing." Spike smiled still unable to take his eyes off her.

"I don't want anything to eat. Shall we go?"

Spike nodded, Spike opened the door for her and they walked outside. They walked along the dark streets of Sunnydale. Spike had his hands in his jacket pockets and his shoulders were scrunched up. Both of them didn't know what to say Buffy was walking with her arms crossed and looked up at Spike. Spike smiled and stopped her.

"You got a-" He said and picked a tiny bug out of her hair and flicked it away.

"Thank you." She smiled sweetly.

They carried on walking in an awkward silence and Spike.

"One of us should speak." Buffy said and unfolded her arms.

"Sorry." He smiled.

"Don't worry I don't exactly know what to say either."

"I do." He said embarrassed.

"You do?"

He sighed. "God." He took a deep breath. "I do know what to say, but I'm scared."

"Of what?"

"I don't know." He sighed and rubbed his forehead. She didn't say anything and looked at Spike who was shaking.

"Your shaking." She said and grabbed his hand.

Spike looked at his hand and looked at her. He looked into her eyes and took another deep breath. "Last night…It um. I have never been like that with someone before. You know what I mean, I had girls, sex. Sex with you. But nothing was as meaningful as that was." He looked down and back up at her. "When I was human I had never been with anyone. And last night to just have that connection with that I had never had with anyone…It was amazing." He looked at her and carried on walking down the road.

"You took the words out of my mouth…About it being amazing." She smiled.

They walked again in silence and Buffy laced her fingers though his, they held hands and Spike clenched her hand tightly and she did the same to his.


	15. dead friends

**Chapter 15. Dead friends**

When Buffy and Spike came back from patrolling they walked in the house laughing and Willow walked over to them.

"Buffy." She said serious.

"What's wrong?" Buffy started to worry.

"Dawn."

"What? What happened?"

"She's drunk."

"She's drunk?"

Willow nodded.

"Where is she?"

"Up in her room. Or the bathroom."

Buffy sighed and marched up the stairs to Dawns bedroom and then heard the toilet flush and walked into the bathroom. Dawn looked up at Buffy, her eyes were puffy and smelt of sick.

"Why have you been drinking?"

"I went to a party." Dawn said and tried to stand up but put her head down the toilet again and was sick.

"You know not to drink Dawn!"

"Sorry." Dawn said between throwing up.

Buffy crossed her arms. "What is up with you lately."

"You ask me." Dawn got up and washed her face.

"What do you mean?"

"Now Spike is back your more focused on him. Plus you kept me up last night."

Buffy rolled her eyes. "So you do this to get attention?"

Dawn shrugged her shoulders.

"Dawn I love you, I care about you. Things aren't getting bad again. It's just now Spike Is back and has a soul. Things have changed between me and him."

"Do you love him?"

"I do," Buffy said softly.

"Ha I knew it." Dawn laughed and Buffy looked confused. "I know its not going to get bad I just wanted to get it out of you!"

"So why are drinking then?"

"I'm 16 nearly 17! Your telling me you didn't drink."

"You drink again and get the truth out me like that. I'll…I'll take away…Your curfew will be lowered. To 10 o'clock!" Buffy smiled. "HA!"

"Okay, okay I get it. Drinking is wrong, wont happen again. Blah, blah, blah."

"And just tell me if you want to know about Spike. You're my sister I would tell you things. But some things between me and him are private."

"What like last night was in your room?" Dawn laughed. "Because pretty much the people down the block heard."

Buffy pointed at Dawn and walked out back down the stairs.

"How's little sis?" Spike asked her and they both walked into the living room.

"She. She won't be doing it again." Buffy said and sat down on the couch next to Willow.

"She is a teenager. We were like it…Well not me, but other kids were." Willow said.

"We have all been there."

"I got to go to college tomorrow so I'm going to have an early night."

"Night Will."

"Yeah night." Spike said and sat down where Willow was sitting.

"Well then, just looks like its me and you." Spike said.

"I'm gonna go to bed as well. I'm pretty tired."

"Right then." Spike said and got up. "I will see you in the morning."

"That was an invite for you as well." She said quietly and smiled sweetly.

"Was it now?" Smiled Spike.

"Uh huh."

Buffy got up and pulled him close to her and started to kiss him. She wrapped her arms around him and he ran his fingers through her soft hair.

"Your amazing Buffy." He smiled.

"So are you." She replied and grabbed his hand and lead him up the stairs.

Outside there was an old friend of Spikes watching them. "Tut,Tut Spikey your all soulful and giving. Mummys here to stop it." Drusilla laughed and walked into the shadows.


	16. A not so friendly face

Sorry I have not posted in a few days, I've been really busy! Anyway I hope you like this chapter.

**Chapter 16. A not so friendly face.**

The next night as soon as the sun went down Spike left the house, Buffy had not returned from work yet and he was gagging for a good fight. He walked down the driveway and stopped and looked around him. He good sense something, he shook his head and carried on walking.

Drusilla walked out from behind a tree and watched Spike walk down the road and started following him.

Spike kept looking over his shoulder all the way to the cemetery he kept thinking someone was there. But of course when he turned round none was to be seen.

He walked onto the grass on stood in front of a fresh grave he leant against a tree and lit up a cigarette.

He heard a noise and looked over the grave and saw a hand coming out of the ground and then another one. Spike threw his cigarette on the floor and started to get impatient and grabbed the vampire and picked it up of the grave and threw it on the floor.

"About bloody time!" Spike sighed. "Oh and love your coat." Spike pointed at the man vampire.

The vampire charged at Spike and knocked Spike down. Drusilla watched in the shadows what Spike had become.

Spike threw the vampire off him and stood up and brushed his leather jacket down. He looked at the vamp and morphed into his vamp face, he charged at the vampire and hit him until he was on the ground.

"Come on mate! It ain't no fun when you don't fight back." Laughed Spike.

The vamp struggled to get up and looked at Spike panting out of breath. Spike growled and started fighting the vampire again, until he got bored and dusted him.

"Piece of piss that was." He brushed his hands together.

He heard something in the darkness and quickly turned his head, he saw Drusilla walking out from the shadows towards him. He morphed out of his vamp face and backed away from Drusilla.

"Drusilla?" He said shocked.

"My little Spike blinded by love. You got the slayer all over you." She said in disgust.

"What are you doing here?"

"The stars were singing to me. They whispered…Said you got a soul."

"Yeah. That I have Dru."

"I came to make you bad again. We don't need another Angel do we." She circled him.

"I'm not like Angel and I've changed a lot, you can't make me bad Dru."

"Oh but I can." She said and smoothed his parodied blonde hair. "You got no chip anymore." She tapped his head and took a step back.

"Leave Dru."

"Can you do it?" She laughed. "Can you kill me?"

Spike held the stake in his hand tightly and Drusilla laughed.

"No my Spikey could never hurt me."

"If you can't remember pet I nearly did."

"I'll see you around Spikey." She said and stepped back into the shadows.

Spike threw at where Dru had just walked in anger and walked quickly out the cemetery gates and back onto the streets. He sighed and stopped walking and started to hit the wall in anger.

"Spike!" Buffy called out to him from a distance and ran over.

Spike stopped hitting the wall and looked at her.

"What are you doing?" She asked.

"Nothing, just my soul…Remembering a few more things…It gets hard." He lied.

"Oh are you okay?"

"I will be now." He smiled at her.

"You weren't home when I got back from work."

"No. I um got bored needed a good fight."

"Did you get one?"

"Yeah."

"Okay."

"I um…I have to go but I'll see you back at home."

"Spike what's wrong?"

"I love you Buffy." He said looking her straight in the eyes.

"I know." She gently said.

"Whatever happens I love you."

"What will happen?"

"I'll talk to you later." He said backing away from her and walked off.

Buffy looked at Spike walking away from her and walked into the cemetery then back out. She couldn't get Spike and what was wrong off her mind and walked off the direction he walked in.


	17. Choices

**Sorry its been so long since I posted. I been on holiday**

**Chapter 17. Choices.**

Buffy found Spike gazing at his beer bottle in the Bronze. She walked up to him and got him on his feet.

"What is wrong Spike?"

"Nothing." He sighed and sat back down.

"There is. You was not like this when you left the house tonight."

"What I do…Everything I do is for you. You do know that right?"

"Spike what is going on?"

Spike got up out of his chair and dragged Buffy out of the Bronze. He let go of her hand started pacing around the ally.

"Spike." She gently said.

He shook his head.

"What is it?"

"Me." Drusilla said and walked out from the darkness in his vamp face.

"Drusilla?" Buffy cried.

"Hello Buffy." Dru said and circled Spike.

"Get away from him." Buffy half shouted at her.

"Scared I will get old Spike back."

"No, it didn't work last time, it won't work now."

"See Spike has a soul now he can feel things."

I don't feel for you Dru." Spike said and pushed her away from him.

"Yes you do, otherwise you couldn't kill me."

"You made me."

"I know I did. You tasted all fresh."

Spike walked to Buffy and stood by Buffys side. "I love Buffy."

"I know, that's why you got a soul, gave old Spike up." She sadly said.

"No, I still am the Spike I use to be. Just a more friendly one."

"Not towards pigs though." Dru laughed. "We don't need another Angel in this world."

"I am nothing like that bloody dickhead." Spike said angry.

"So kill me." Dru said holding her hands out waiting.

Buffy looked at Spike who was clenching the stake in his hand.

"Come on Spike." Dru taunted him.

Spike sighed and looked at Buffy and walked away into the shadows.

"Well isn't he nice. Left you all alone with me. Where I will kill you."

"You know how bored I get of vampires saying that to me." Buffy said.

Dru ran towards Buffy and they started to fight for awhile. Buffy ended up on the floor and Drusilla looked over her. "See you around Buffy."

Buffy got to her feet and limped home Spike was in the basement hitting the punch bag with full vamp strength. He screamed and morphed into his vamp face and hit the punch bag. It went flying across the room. Buffy stood at the bottom of the stairs with her arms crossed. Spike turned and looked at her in his vamp face.

"Spike don't let her win."

"She is in my head Buffy." He said tapping his head. "AND I CAN'T GET HER OUT." He shouted and started hitting the wall.

Buffy ran over to him and stopped him.

"SPIKE STOP!" She cried and held his hands.

He looked down at their hands together and morphed out of his vamp face and looked at Buffy.

"I'm still weak Buffy." He whispered. "I'm strong when I'm with you…But Drusilla I can't handle that, she is the meaning of why I am here…She is the bad part of me. And that part of me is finding it hard to let her go."

He sighed and stepped back a step and took his hands away from hers.

"See I loved you when I had no soul, you might not of thought it but I bloody well did. You were in my dreams all I could bloody think about. Drusilla is in one part of me, the one side I'm trying to let go."

"Then let go." Buffy said.

"Not that easy." He shook his head. "This is Drusilla! Even if I have a soul its still gonna be hard for me! And the same for Angel and Darla. He won't admit it but it was hard for him to kill her."

Buffy said nothing and walked up to the stairs and slammed the door. She did understand where Spike was coming from but just didn't want to.


	18. Show time

**Chapter 18. Show time.**

Spike paced around the basement thinking he got angry and threw the table across the room screaming. He grabbed his leather jacket and quickly walked up the stairs and out of the house. Buffy stood at the top of the stairs and watched him walked out. He stood at the bottom of the driveway and picked up Drusillas sent. He followed it to a demon bar and walked in, he looked around at all the vampires and demons and saw Drusilla sat alone at the bar. He walked up to her and stood next to her.

"Hello Spike." She said without looking at him. "Thought you would be tucked up in bed with your Buffy."

"Me and you, lets have at it." He quietly said.

She turned at looked up at him. "You really want to?"

"I want you out-"

"I know you do but Spike I will never leave you, even if you kill me."

"Lets go." He said and walked out of the bar.

Buffy watched from the shadows and saw Spike walk out of the bar followed by Drusilla.

"Come on then Spike." She said as she morphed in her vamp face. "Lets go."

Spike threw the first punch and she blocked it and threw him against the wall.

"You were a better fighter when you were evil." She laughed.

"No. I still am now." He said pissed off and morphed into his vamp face and charged at her.

They carried on fighting and she got Spike on the floor, he was panting out of breath and beat up. He sat blood out of his mouth and looked up at Drusilla.

Drusilla stood on top of him dangling a stake in front of him. "Tut, tut." She said shaking her head. "Looks like your going to be the one who dies Spike."

Buffy was still stood in the shadows watching them.

"No. I'm not." He said and jumped up off the ground.

He kicked to the floor and grabbed the stake off her and pressed it against her heart. "Goodbye Dru." He said and pushed it in her and watched her turn to dust.

He got up and wiped away the blood from his face, he heard a noise and saw Buffy walk out from the shadows.

"Buffy." He said softly.

"You did it." She said looking at his beat up face.

Spike smiled. "Yeah I did."

She fell into his arms and they held each other.

"Nothing is ever going to come between us again." He promised her.

She pulled away and wiped away his tears and kissed him.


End file.
